Great letter. Everything in it makes perfect sense and you've presented the facts with proof. I read how disgracefully your mother acted towards you, on your previous post, so she deserves this letter. She deserves worse, imo, but good for you for remaining civil and polite despite her nastiness.
Gulf Coaster
JoinedPosts by Gulf Coaster
-
21
Letter To My Mother
by pale.emperor inseeing as im being shunned by my family and friends.
i've decided to turn the tables and shun them back - but using the same methodology and reasoning they use on me.
i've written the following letter:.
-
-
-
19
Help Me Regain Contact With My Still In Family
by pale.emperor insituation is, i'll never return to the wt.
my family with never leave the wt.. depending on who you ask you'll get the following answers when you ask about me:.
my family: he's confused.
-
-
Gulf Coaster
I read your letter on your other post and can absolutely understand why you would shun her back. Your mother's behaviour was poisonous and hateful. Even though your daughter is only 2, she will pick up vibes that make it seem weird & uncomfortable to her. And I don't think young children should be exposed to such toxicity. They're too young to process it. Your her dad and nobody has a right to treat you like you were dirt. I don't believe in putting our parents up on a pedestal and cowering before them. In our childrens' lives, we are Number Uno, not their grandparents.
-
19
Can JWs Use Corporal Punishment On Their Children?
by minimus incan a parent slap or use a "rod of discipline" on their kids?
i know it's politically incorrect and perhaps illegal, but is it a personal decision based upon the scriptures or is it taboo these days?.
-
-
Gulf Coaster
Well hopefully it's changed in recent years because they sure had no problem giving kids of all ages a walloping in the 70s. Especially for not sitting rigidly like a solder for 2 hours. Kids would be hauled into the restroom or outside and smacked, or god knows whatever it was that caused them to scream and holler in terror! It was totally abusive, given the competely unreasonable circumstances - forcing young kids to sit quietly and still like that in a boring meeting with nothing to do. Torture.
-
22
If Apostates Were Allowed To Stay In The Congregations...
by JW_Rogue inmy wife was playing the "stay loyal" convention that she taped the other day and i noticed the brother said something that wasn't in the outline.
during one of the talks friday on shunning he said "can you imagine if apostates were allowed to stay in the congregations?
the congregations would be a garbage heap instead of the spiritual paradise they are now.
-
-
Gulf Coaster
They love to disparage and sneer at people who think for themselves and who don't swallow everything their precious GB utters. For all their posturing and preening, they're actually nasty jerks, the JWs.
-
44
Things I remember growing up in the 70s
by The Rebel ini remember sitting on my daddy's lap and driving an imaginary car, i also remember sitting on my mummies lap on the front seat, without a seat belt whilst my dad drove a real car.
i remember we bought fish and chips from the chippy wrapped in yesterday's newspapers.
i remember bouncing up and down on my space hopper in the garden.
-
-
Gulf Coaster
My dad had a van for his business. On weekends, he'd take out all his tools and gear from the back and we'd go to the beach. Since the van only had two seats in the front, with no seat belts, he'd put patio chairs in the back of the van for us to sit on. If we ever got rowdy or whinged too much, he'd either brake, accelerate or swerve, sending us flying in the back. We laugh about it now but these days, he'd probably get arrested, despite us never getting hurt.
I grew up in Australia so fish and chips were the best thing too. Wrapped in newspaper, of course. We'd sneak out of the schoolyard once a week, to the local chippy around the corner. Things always taste best when forbidden. We'd toss our sandwiches in the bin or feed them to the magpies. When we got caught, we'd get the stick for punishment, and not do it again. For a few weeks.
-
12
Something's Gotta Give
by pale.emperor ini've been 100% alone since my df last month.
i'm dead to my family now, unless i return to their cult - so i recently made contact with 3 former jw's that were in my cong when i was in my youth.
to my surprise, they all had exactly the same doubts and reasoning i had and said even though they've been out 6-7 years they "still feel tied to it in some way" and "feel guilty celebrating xmas or birthdays".
-
-
Gulf Coaster
FayeDunaway has a very valuable point there. Once you look into the background of the jw cult, you see it for what it is. A man-made scam.
I left way before the internet days so my research consisted of a few books in the Religion section of the library. The fact that I was doing that research was a clear indication that I felt there was something very wrong with that "religion". I felt that from about age 15 and over the next few years I became 100% convinced that the cult was full of sh**.
So when I left at age 20, I felt no guilt at jumping right into the worldly life because I knew those simple joys were not wrong. Christmas, Halloween, birthdays, singing the anthem, playing sports, sleeping in on the weekends, clubbing, swearing, making my own true friends who did all of that and more.
No guilt but the ties are still there today, 36 years later, because my 88 year old mother is still in and will die in it. She shunned me for a few years but after that, I forged a civil but cool relationship with her. Out of obligation, I suppose. I avoid talking about her cult because that's the fastest way to get her yabbering on about her jehoohah and how I need to return, blah blah blah. I change the subject, or end the call. Even after she dies, that tie will still be there because I'll look back and see that I didn't have the same close, loving relationship my friends and family have with their mothers. And I will forever look back at the early years of my life and see the deprivations and bizarreness of it, thanks to the cult.
I wouldn't worry if you don't feel you're ever totally over it. It's not surprising because face it, the cult damages us.
-
15
For those that carry on as JWs secretly not believing.....
by snare&racket inmy heart goes out for all people stuck in all high control groups, either with insight into the falsehood of their beliefs or none.. to remain a member whilst knowing it false however, must be soul destroying.. my question is, would you carry on living the lie if you discovered that we get one life, one go at existing.
it's short, it's fragile and nobody in 100 years will care we even existed..... .......if you came to that realisation would you quit?.
.......if you had children, would you leave in order to set them an example in strength and appreciation of the short time we enjoy?.
-
-
Gulf Coaster
I lived that lie for about 4 years, only because I couldn't just up and leave. I was in my teens and had nowhere to go to. So I pretended and lived the lie until I could get myself established financially and get an outside network of support. Many have to stay stuck in for years, for various reasons, despite knowing it's all soul-crushing BS and a waste of life. My heart goes out to them because I know what it's like but at least I had an end goal to look forward to.
-
47
Don't have sexual fantasies! Today's watchtower...
by purrpurr inthe watchtower today says not to think of sex, or to have sexual fantasies.
i'm just wondering... how many people in the hall hearing this watchtower today would be having sexual fantasies?
sitting there thinking about sister hottie or brother hunky ?.
-
-
Gulf Coaster
Of course people have sexual fantasies, so by saying you shouldn't have them, they're just making you feel guilty. The cult is all about tearing you down, making you feel less than, not good enough, bad. The only praise is for doing jehoohah's work, bothering people at their houses or on the streets with those carts. And even with that, it's never enough.
-
10
My son is going off to a university this fall
by Tameria2001 inhello everyone, i have some really good news, and just can't hold it in any longer.
my youngest is going off to a university in august, and he will be majoring in business management, and marketing.
when i see what my son is doing with his life, it makes the decision to leave the jws, i made all those years ago, when his older brother was just starting school, all the more worth it.
-
-
Gulf Coaster
Fantastic news. It makes it feel even sweeter when you know what the alternative could have been, had you not made the courageous decision to leave. I'm always thankful when I think of the joyful, free lives my own two got to live, compared to the dismal existence I had for 11 years. What many take for granted (those who were never trapped in a cult), we appreciate perhaps more. Enjoy!
-
51
" you will never grow old..."
by mrquik in" you will never grow old..." a more grievous lie is hard to imagine.
i heard this one first in 1957. i was 6. my mother had just converted.
i heard it many times after that.
-
-
Gulf Coaster
My JW mother is quite bitter about that trope. She'll be 88 and her health isn't the best. When she talks about her many aches and pains, she'll often petulantly add "I wasn't supposed to grow old!".
She had swallowed that one hook, line and sinker. So much so that when I walked away years ago, she screamed at me that I was going to die and she'd live forever, with a smug look on her face. We don't discuss her cult anymore since it's a guaranteed way to make the conversation descend into vitriol but I can tell there's a lot of disappointment in it for her. There's certainly no joy. Going to meetings and conventions seems like a chore for her now. I guess she wasn't expecting to have to endure that soul-crushing boredom for so long (46 years).